Backs, Ribs, And Deadlines

I haven’t been able to write for several days because of weather changes and the resulting accompanying back pain. The past three days being the worst. Sunday I couldn’t get out of bed. Monday, The Husband took off work to look after me because neither of us were sure I wouldn’t need to go to the E.R.  However, I am pretty convinced the emergency department would tag me as a “drug seeker” and not do anything truly helpful.  Today has been hellish, just not quite as bad as yesterday.

Right this very second I am feeling better than any point earlier.  I am very thankful for the reprieve, too.

Amid all the pain in said back, including sternum, the one thing on my mind has been the novel and finishing the final draft in order to get it on to Kindle by the end of this month.  I have fluctuated between despair – half convinced I wasn’t going to make my deadline – and pure determination, because this is adraft.d storyand I hope people like reading it as much as I am writing the story. The Husband told meifi could get in my wheelchair and stay upright long enough to work to go for it, but if I couldn’t do that a good idea might be to cut myself a break and heal for a while before vanishing into Thriller Land.  Yes, he did make me smile.

Tomorrow is another day, and, God willing, there will be more words added to the final draft.

Hoping you are having good word count days!☺

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A Cuppa Does Wonders For The Mind (And Soul)

Today, for some unintelligible reason, has been a stressful one.  The only thing I’ve wanted to do today – as well as need to do – is work on the novel and increase final draft production.  Have I been able to do this?  No.  Why?  I can’t point at one single reason!

There just seems to be some sort of conspiracy happening today that, no matter how much I get done, there is never enough time to sit and write.  It grew to such a discomforting level a stress headache began forming so I called a halt to everything requiring my attention other than the novel and, at The Suggestion of a cup of tea, I quickly took him up on said cuppa.

(Along with the tea – pumpkin spice with three lumps of sugar, yum – I made sure to drink some water in case I was becoming dehydrated.)

After just a couple of sips, I began to feel better.  The headache was still present, but I felt confident the tea would correct it, and it did.  Along with the tea, I roamed the Internet and sighed a lot, at first, because much of what I read was sad and depressing.  Deciding my time was best served reading something other than ‘dreary’, I followed random links and found myself smiling.  Then, just as I was booting up Word, I noticed the dogs were splayed around me sleeping and no one else was in the dining room, which is where I seem to prefer to write, except me, and said dogs.

However, the question remains:  How much work will I be able to get done with what’s left of today?  And, yes, I know I am taking up time to write a blog post, but there are times when there just needs to be space to breathe, think, prepare.  Blogging helps me do this.  Maybe it helps because blog posts are read, which means I am not completely alone; it is just you all are not in the dining room.  This is good, because the dining room isn’t all that big to hold everyone.

Now, off to work for me.

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Beyond Words

Just a really quick moment to wave and say hi!  The novel is running and I am doing my best to keep up.  I know for certain Chapter One is ready and the following chapters, as far as final draft are concerned, are coming along nicely.  I will try my best and update as much as possible this week.  Last week I worked every day and, by the end of each one, I was mentally and emotionally drained and blogging/visiting was impossible.

Back to work for m.  Hope everyone’s day is going well!

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And We Turn Yet Again

Working.  Writing is difficult.  In general, it is difficult.  It is especially difficult when you don’t feel well.  Since I haven’t received any comments or likes on the posts of the past month and detailing my life, as it were, I have removed all of those posts and have decided to just keep going as necessary.  The public has spoken, or not spoken, as it were.  It is always difficult to tell what will be popular and what won’t.  Part of me feels as if I should be upset, but, in truth, I don’t.  It was an experiment, and it didn’t go well.

The deadline for the story is still November, however, I believe it may not be until the last day of November when it is finished and up on Kindle.  As long as I meet the November deadline I’ve set for myself, I will be very happy and accomplish the main goal I set for myself this year.

Here in Kentucky, we are in full fall.  The trees are deciding if they want to turn or not.  Some trees are trying on different colors for the big Fall Fling.  I am excited to see what the fall tree fashion is going to be like.

Music:  “Playing Dead”, Bobaflex, Album- Hell In My Heart

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Wherein The Writer Posts An Update

Hi all!  I’ve been writing.  Seriously working for the first time in a number of months and I feel…relieved, to be honest.

This novel is going a different way and there are several different sections written, waiting to be inserted at the proper time and order.  I’ve never written like this before and it feels weird and exhilarating.  Now I have reached the beginning chapter so will start keeping tabs on words.

Oh…yeah:  I have been challenged to truthfully recount my days with the pain and how I handle the world.  This challenge comes from a friend and cousin whom I love very much and I am taking them up on it, though I won’t begin this task until tomorrow.  For now – words:

Total words so far chapter one:  1755

Reason for stopping:  Laptop began to grumble about being too hot.

Favorite line today:  N/A

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Back At Long Last

The vacation was much needed.  Although I couldn’t escape from the pain, I managed to find the space needed to rest, relax, and recoup from everything going on, so far, this year.  Now I am feeling renewed and as refreshed as possible with the weather changing and sending the arthritis into overdrive on the “I really hate you” front.  This, however, is normal.  I rather like “normal” sometimes.  

During the vacation, I’ve discovered that, although my Kindle is wonderful, it really can’t handle everything I do, want to do, or need to do, especially on the writing front.  If anyone uses a tablet to write on the go and take pictures, etc., could you share your tab!et choices and why you chose it?  I have looked at several, including a Samsung Galaxies E, which does seem to fit most of the criteria I have.  Does anyone out there use this particular one?

Now that i am back, there is a highdive into the ink mines!  Getting excited and nervous as the self-imposed deadline approaches.  Following through with the idea Cheyenne suggested has pushed the creativity.

In other, not so pleasant news:  We had to put our 19 year old

 Gabby down.  I really miss her.  What is worse is Sniffleshad to put Dot down just two weeks before.  The household is down to four dogs.  All boys.


Dot T Napoleon Stewart

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Review – Close Range

After watching Boyka:  Undisputed, I decided to watch another Scott Adkins flick.  This time I chose Close Range.  I should’ve chosen another movie.  Boyka:  Undisputed had everything I could ask for in an action flick.  It had lots of well-done action sequences and there was a story you could get behind.  Sadly, Close Range had very few of these things.

The story propelling Close Range forward is family.  Scott Adkins’ character, Colton MacReady, goes into Mexico to rescue his niece.  She is a teenager and he hasn’t seen her for years, but she has been kidnapped by a drug cartel and taken to Mexico as hostage until her stepdad can provide the main bad guy, ludicrously named “El Jeffe”, with some dope he was helping to smuggle.  Stepdad kept some cocaine back for himself.  “I didn’t think he would miss it,” he said, which made me roll my eyes.  A drug dealer isn’t going to miss the delivery shipment is short?  Give me a break.  What’s worse is Stepdad has a horrible Southern accent, slicked back hair, and an open bowling shirt open over a white tee shirt.  Thankfully it doesn’t take Stepdad long to get killed.

The woman playing Sister MacReady gave a very flat performance.  Supposedly she grew up on a ranch, but as for shooting a gun, well, she didn’t do so well.  Her performance was SO bad I pretty much ignored her scenes.  However, the niece’s performance was passable.

One of my main beefs with this movie is the amount of ammunition that was fired and how few targets were hit.  Round after round was fired from various weapons and the hits were just lucky.  I bet they fired over five boxes of ammunition in the movie (fake, of course) and people were still left alive for Scott Adkins’ character to take them out one-on-one.  There wasn’t any other option left to him even though he was supposed to be a soldier and mercenary.

The one-on-one action sequences were good though.  Scott Adkins’ performance says he knows what he is doing as far as martial arts is concerned and were a pleasure to watch.  His martial arts is about the only thing good in this movie.

So, don’t watch this movie unless you are keeping copies of all Scott Adkins’ movies.  If this is the case get the DVD, but don’t worry about watching it unless you have a drinking game going on with how many people do not get shot.

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Review – Boyka: Undisputed

 

I am an action film fan.  Some would say I borderline on fanatic.  Either way, I love me some action movies.  This past weekend I was roaming around Netflix and discovered Boyka:  Undisputed starring Scott Adkins.  It is a very good movie!

There are a lot of action movies that leave you either wanting action or a story.  This one has both – story and action.  The fight scenes are done very well and the acting is more than passable and enter into the realm of good with a few bordering on great!

Up until this movie, I hadn’t really paid too much attention to Adkins to be honest.  After watching the movie, I am going to make sure and catch his movies a lot more often, and I am going to look up the rest of the Boyka movies.

In this edition of Boyka, the main character kills his opponent in the ring and then goes about gaining forgiveness for the act, which was accidental, by helping the dead fighter’s family.  What happens in his search for forgiveness pushes the movie forward plausibly.

If you like action movies, I highly recommend you checking out this latest edition in the Boyka saga.

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‘You Wouldn’t Think the Ashes of a Man Would Be So Heavy’: Remembering Sam Shepard

There is a link to read The New Yorker story. Please do. It is excellent. I always admired this man’s writing and enjoyed his acting.

Longreads

Broadway World reports today that Oscar-nominated actor and Pulitzer-winning playwright Sam Shepard has died at 73 of complications from ALS, AKA Lou Gherig’s disease.

In recent years, Shepard was best known as an actor, in the last few years appearing as the Rayburn family patriarch in the Netflix drama Bloodline. But he was a prolific, ground-breaking playwright, and a key player in the Off-Broadway movement of the ’60s and ’70s. According to The New York Times, Shepard won a Pulitzer in 1979 for The Curse of the Starving Class, and received nominations for two others, True West, and Fool for Love.

His work examined toxic masculinity at a time when that was rare. The son of an alcoholic farmer, he explored male aggression as it is often passed down from fathers to sons. In 2010, critic John Lahr touched on this in a profile…

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Out And Getting Close To About

Out of hospital.  I do not have epilepsy!

So, what is it?

They don’t know.  It could be a stress response to the chronic pain.  For this possibility I am heading back to pain management for a do-over, or whatever it is they do.  I am also going to the optometrist.

Since I’ve been off the seizure medication, one particular episode has slowed drastically, but other symptoms are still present and headache related.  I am also planning on going to see my optometrist just to make sure these aren’t being caused by something to do with my eyes.

Although I feel as if my normal stress is quite controlled, I don’t try to pay attention to the pain.  So, I’ve begun doing the old tricks I learned to keep things even more positive around me and on the inside, too.  Hopefully they will help me control any subconscious stress over the pain I may be having.  Isn’t it strange how your body lets you know things aren’t right and you need to take care of them now, not later?

Even though I am still having the temporal seizure “episodes”, they are slowing in number, but I still can’t play or watch two video games because of the colors and the flashes.  The Husband says I have no problem playing “matte” games, but to stay away from the other, and, of course, I’ve forgotten what he called them.  And, I am doing just that:  Staying away from the other type of video games.

When the doctor told me I didn’t have epilepsy I was thrilled!  When I asked him what it was and he answered he didn’t know, and that it was probably a stress response my next question was:  “What do we do now?  What’s next?”

“I don’t know,” he answered.  “I’m glad I don’t have to cut on your brain,” he followed up.  I felt cheated.  The next step for him was simply psychotherapy and he left the room.  I felt cheated.  If my problem wasn’t in his expertise, he was through with me.  However, despite his actions, I will find out what is causing these problems and I will find some sort of treatment.  Merely assuming something about a person, especially in the medical professions, is wrong.  I felt, at that moment, as though he was calling me liar, or a faker, a hypochondriac, an attention seeker.  I am none of those things.  I’ve lived too long with pain.  All I really want is some sort of answer, a good answer, not a guess.  Am I asking too much?  Probably.

Enough of the annoying stuff.  Life is too short for the bullshit and letting it control you.

So:

Tomorrow begins the Dormition Fast.  It is a fast we follow to honor the “falling asleep of the most Holy Lady Theotokos and ever virgin, Mary.”  This year I am going to push further into the fast for my spiritual health.  If I am hiding stress, this will help me.  I’ll post my fasting goals tomorrow, when the fast actually begins.

 

Posted in 2017, epiphanies, family, health, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment