It is fall here in the mountains. Seeing the leaves fall and other leaves begin to turn, I feel in the center of the season instead of just sort of observing it as I would’ve done in Lexington. Instead of making me sad or pensive, because I can see the Earth prepare for slumber. It is getting into its pajamas now. I’ve never seen fall through these eyes before. Does that mean they’re old? Or, just older than last year and the many years past? I must admit, some days I feel way older than my years and ancient in my heart. I am glad it passes – I couldn’t handle feeling like that every day forever. I guess I am just not ready for it, but, Are you ever ready for that stage of life? I wish my Mommy here so I could ask her.
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Every so often I pass a milestone, or develop a new ache, and say, “I’m old.” Other days work out fine and I don’t even consider my age. For me, it’s only the bad things that make me think I’m getting old. Things I learn, or behavior I improve, those don’t make me feel old, they make me feel better.
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